I continued running and preparing for my NS after my A levels ended. I managed to keep in contact with some of my close friends and even started talking to one of my long lost friends. Eventually, the day neared and it was the CNY period. Visits after visits, questions bombarded at me regarding my enlistment, my confidence level for my A levels and of course, as for all people my age, my relationship status. They were surprised when they found out of my enlistment,  told me that it is a slack cave where it was heaven compared to Tekong. I laughed these comments off. 

Then came the day of my enlistment, 4th February 2014. I reached HTA with my family. Separated from our families, all trainees-to-be had to get our admin stuff done and I can still remember all the sad faces of the people around me. Like I said before, I was trying to maintain a positive mindset but when you're enlisting, the feeling is just unbearable. You feel like you are controlled and forced to serve some way or another, no matter how patriotic you may be. When we handed over our pink ICs, they just started screaming at us. "You are trainees now! You better hurry up and move!". All I was thinking was that I had to sleep. I thought that the 4 months stay would be like this throughout, getting screamed at and feeling "lower than grass"(they actually said we were lower than grass and we were not allowed to step on the grass).

On the second day, we had our first physical related activity. We learnt basic drills and collected our items given free by the government. We were going to change into our PT kits but our Field Instructor (Sgt in SAF terms, the one who trains you physically) said that we will have to do 50 pushups, 50 sit ups and 50 jumping jacks to test our fitness. I did it but I felt like my arms were failing me. That night we had water parade. I honestly thought that it would be something slack and just drinking water. But no. We were made to hold our fully filled to the brim 1 litre water bottle parallel to the ground for 45mins?

The worst part of confinement was when we had mass PT. They just screamed at us, made us do countless counts of pushups of all kinds; diamond, standard, wide, triceps. I wanted to die. We moved on to core exercises, these were the easiest but they were still hard. The number of fall outs increased as the counts increased. People just gave up doing or their body gave way. The most difficult were the leg exercises. I always had weak legs. I mean at this height, the weakest part of my body should be my legs, considering how long my muscles are. Power legs, frog squats, half squats. I didn't fall out though. I just kept doing, even though I took 10 secs of rest to do one rep at some point in time. lol...

In the past 15 weeks, I had ran around the track till my leg was sore, done pull-ups till my palms grew calluses, tested my mind when my body was clearly giving up.  I have made friends which I can call brothers for life. I have had the worst buddy and worst squad IC anyone could have. I have failed my law test even though I studied so hard for it (full marks to pass yet I clicked one wrong option accidentally). Now that I have POPed, I can say that I'm stronger and I'm more mature.

I remember when I introduced myself, I said that I wish to improve my level of tolerance. I didn't achieve that. What I attained however, was the realisation that what I deem wrong is correct in the other person's eyes and I should give them my respect and trust that they might actually be right. I realised that the innuendos were just due to pure immaturity and people would eventually out grow them. They just need time and the opportunity to.

Like many have said, it is not a good time for guys to have relationships. I agree to a large extent. The feeling of affection could just be due to desperation. We are just too deprived of interaction with the opposite sex (trying to make it sound more scientific right here). Who knows if the females who are willing to play along with our puppy love are not feeling lonely too? What would happen if they enter university and they know much cooler looking and more talented guys whom they would meet almost everyday? Don't get me wrong here. Before you say that I have no say in this because I am not into anyone, let me tell you that I am or at least, I was. She's the long lost friend I mentioned in the post earlier. Of course, my realisation is not only based on this girl. There was another someone who used to meant a lot to me but it didn't work out. I just reflected on the "encounter" (I have no idea what to call it) and took a stand. Maybe someday I shall share the specifics of my enlightenment.

Another thing I have learnt is the blood is truly thicker than water. I always doubted this saying. I'm not saying that I cannot trust my closest of friends. I trust them. What I'm saying here is that the only people who you can trust for sure is your family. I mean the last person who would betray you should be either one of your family member. Maybe it's just my sensitivity, but I sometimes feel like I'm treated unfairly, like I'm replaceable. But then, in reality, who isn't?

Now that I have said all this, I have laid a few aims targeted at self-improvement. In no order of importance, health and fitness, family, drawing, gaming and perhaps something music related.

I want to gain weight. As of now, I have gained quite a bit since POP. I enlisted at 62.5kg and am now 70kg, give and take a little.  I'm not buff but I'm way stronger and fitter than before. I want to continue this, maybe hit 80kg or so and get a nicer physique. I have also developed a love for running. The breeze running through your hair (scalp for me) and the post-run adrenaline rush you get, just simply amazing.

Family. I mentioned this. In addition to that, my parents are getting older and I would like to make up for what they have been doing for me all my life by spending more time with them although this means more chances of getting into trouble hahaha. I feel like my family needs me.

Drawing. I have started drawing since J1. The interest was reignited this year and I'm now taking initiative in improving my drawing through the Internet. I am also taking adult drawing classes. I'm always the artsy kind of person. Arts over sports any day everyday.

Gaming. If I have the chance to, I will definitely try to get into the local e-sports scene. I learn a lot through gaming. Don't ask me how. I just get the feeling that I did. Who knows? Besides the feeling of winning a match and outplaying other people is just damn awesome.

I'm and artsy person. I have attempted learning the drums, the guitar, the ukelele and the piano. Now that I'm in NS and I have more time to develop my interests, I would pick something music related because I like the feel of creating something that could potentially be magical.

I know I'm not there yet. But at least I know that I'm a step closer to being unique and well rounded. Or shall I say, extraordinary (SPF puns)

Once again, POP loh. I love 154th intake NS4, my Field Instructor, FI Farhan and my course manager, CM Terence.

Quite a long read. Pictures up soon! Till the next time~